For sometime I was single.
While I prided myself on being a rational person and seeing both sides, I must admit my view was, of course, limited because I hadn't been on both sides, merely just looked over and thought I had a good enough perspective.
So now I am on the other side.
And I look back at the fence and ... well, I still feel the same way.
There are those folks, most folks, that once they are in a new relationship, they are consumed with that new person. Suddenly everyone one that was once a friend is no more. Whether it be not enough time to spend with those ol' friends or the new love doesn't approve. Perhaps there are other reasons, but it seems to boil down to those two.
I have usually been on the single/ol' friend side that suddenly got pushed to the wayside. I never appreciated that. I understood that a new relationship requires time to take root and one wants to spend time with their new love but come on!!!! I still exist too! What am I? Dirt????
[deep breath]
So I have been in a new relationship now. I am on the other side. I want to spend a lot of time with my great guy, wonderful beau, handsome man... and I do feel terrible that I don't make as much time to call, write, email, or text my ol' friends. But, I do try to drop a line occasionally. I do say hi and apologize for my neglect.
So I apparently had a friend that used to be single but now he has a gal and I am chopped liver. Just as it was the last time he had a gal. So what will I be next time he is single?
....maybe I will just be busy. .....?.....
.... but I still feel the same way after seeing both sides of the fence.
Friday, August 14, 2009
being Hurt and Healing
Several times during the life of my blog, I have mentioned (more like vented) about being hurt by my brother; and a few times by others. James has done his fair share of damage to our sibling bond, and he continues to disappoint. But if you insist on seeing a positive.... well, he is consistent.
It is funny how you can have blood relations you have nothing in common with and have friends who are a better family than your own.
Brooke, my bff, is more like a sister to me than my own. We are more alike, the same age (to the date, though she is older - haha) and even lived together for a year. She is my sister and I love her.
With that said, we have had our sisterly fights. And we still come through it just as sisters do.
Now I am with Marlin who is just the same with Brooke's husband, Jerald. They are brothers thru and thru. So now when one of us hurt, we both feel it.
Several times we have asked our "siblings" over to dinner or to hang out and for one reason or another, they rarely show. A few times they said yes but failed to make it. This has left Marlin and I feeling very hurt. I had been harboring these feelings for a few weeks trying to let them go or figure out a good way to 'lightly' mention it, without causing a bigger problem.
Brooke is a wonderful sister! I said what I needed and she explained how sorry she was. She and Jerald both know how it seems and though they don't intend to stand us up, it always ends up that way. They are both very sorry and really do want to spend more time together.
I am so thankful I have a sister that I can talk to and is understanding and loves me enough to listen and not get offended or defensive.
I love my sister!
It is funny how you can have blood relations you have nothing in common with and have friends who are a better family than your own.
Brooke, my bff, is more like a sister to me than my own. We are more alike, the same age (to the date, though she is older - haha) and even lived together for a year. She is my sister and I love her.
With that said, we have had our sisterly fights. And we still come through it just as sisters do.
Now I am with Marlin who is just the same with Brooke's husband, Jerald. They are brothers thru and thru. So now when one of us hurt, we both feel it.
Several times we have asked our "siblings" over to dinner or to hang out and for one reason or another, they rarely show. A few times they said yes but failed to make it. This has left Marlin and I feeling very hurt. I had been harboring these feelings for a few weeks trying to let them go or figure out a good way to 'lightly' mention it, without causing a bigger problem.
Brooke is a wonderful sister! I said what I needed and she explained how sorry she was. She and Jerald both know how it seems and though they don't intend to stand us up, it always ends up that way. They are both very sorry and really do want to spend more time together.
I am so thankful I have a sister that I can talk to and is understanding and loves me enough to listen and not get offended or defensive.
I love my sister!
Family Update!
Speaking of Birthdays, we just celebrated my Granny's 80th birthday this past weekend.
My Mom came up and a few cousins came up so it was a little reunion of sorts but all part of my Granny's birthday surprises! Unfortunately there had to be a (figurative) grey cloud. My brother had spoiled part of the day with his criminal habits which really hurt my Mom and grandparents but we put it past us to enjoy the rest of the day. Lynda and Sonny (Marlin's parents) stopped by and met my grandparents for the first time. They all got along and really enjoyed each other.
Today I got a letter for Lisa, Nicholas' mom. I had written her a few times but hadn't heard anything for some time. I had hoped they hadn't moved on so much that I was no longer a thought...
but I finally got a email today. I am so happy to hear from her. I am so glad to hear about their eventful summer and see the pictures of the boys. I am so so glad that she hasn't forgotten me. ........ I hope one day, .... one day.... (sigh) .... when we meet....
I look forward to that day.
......
as for my readers, sorry I don't update as before. I don't feel as ponderous or deep or ... whatever as before. I watch my dogs and garden most of the day. But I am happy and Marlin and I are as happy as ever. Our love and appreciation grows each day.... OH! JOYOUS REPORT - he bought 2 different bibles to start his bible study and he has been so excited about it, his Mom got one too. This could be a big breakthrough for her and his parents. Keep them in your prayers.
I am a blessed person to have my life. It isn't perfect but it is mine and I am thankful for it because of those in it.
God Bless!
My Mom came up and a few cousins came up so it was a little reunion of sorts but all part of my Granny's birthday surprises! Unfortunately there had to be a (figurative) grey cloud. My brother had spoiled part of the day with his criminal habits which really hurt my Mom and grandparents but we put it past us to enjoy the rest of the day. Lynda and Sonny (Marlin's parents) stopped by and met my grandparents for the first time. They all got along and really enjoyed each other.
Today I got a letter for Lisa, Nicholas' mom. I had written her a few times but hadn't heard anything for some time. I had hoped they hadn't moved on so much that I was no longer a thought...
but I finally got a email today. I am so happy to hear from her. I am so glad to hear about their eventful summer and see the pictures of the boys. I am so so glad that she hasn't forgotten me. ........ I hope one day, .... one day.... (sigh) .... when we meet....
I look forward to that day.
......
as for my readers, sorry I don't update as before. I don't feel as ponderous or deep or ... whatever as before. I watch my dogs and garden most of the day. But I am happy and Marlin and I are as happy as ever. Our love and appreciation grows each day.... OH! JOYOUS REPORT - he bought 2 different bibles to start his bible study and he has been so excited about it, his Mom got one too. This could be a big breakthrough for her and his parents. Keep them in your prayers.
I am a blessed person to have my life. It isn't perfect but it is mine and I am thankful for it because of those in it.
God Bless!
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Party Around the World!!
It's my BIRTHDAY!!!!
Today I am 33.
And since all my friends and family are scattered all over the world; My party will encompass the globe (woohoo)! So drink one for me!! Have a toast, eat cake, buy a present for me (chuckles), do something wonderful today because today is a great holiday!
Love you all!
CHEERS!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
USO Day
I love to look at Brownie Locks on occasion to see what silly holiday it is. But some times I notice an important holiday.
Today is USO Day!
Celebrate today by thanking someone in the Armed Forces! And if you are feeling particularly generous, you can even make a contribution to the USO which goes to help out our troops.
Today is USO Day!
Celebrate today by thanking someone in the Armed Forces! And if you are feeling particularly generous, you can even make a contribution to the USO which goes to help out our troops.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Cuddels and Kisses
I have found it! I have found my cuddles and kisses and I love it!
He is my big, wonderful, warm, silly, strong, sexy, funny teadybear!
Song of Solomon is a wonderful book and has become our anthem.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Long lost
As we traverse our path of life, people come and go. We make friends, we lose touch, we grow apart; but true friends have a way of coming back.
Take for example, Trisha. I thought I would never find that girl and low and behold, she found me on MySpace!
Or how about Shane, another friend from high school I had lost touch with, but found me on MySpace too. (That darn MySpace - hahaha)
And why not give MySpace another plug! Randy had found me there too. (Now there is a good story).
Randy was my best friend in high school. Now many of you may be saying, "Wait a dog gone minute, I thought Brooke was?!"
Brooke was my best (girl) friend. But if ever there was a person who knew me better, almost as well as God Himself, it was Randy. He and I were cut from the same fabric it would seem.
Though through the trials of life, our paths seemed to split after high school. I recall the day we last spoke. We were in a crowded bar and he was telling our old class mates his plan for becoming a musician. I cried. I knew at that moment our friendship was over. Our bond was broken. I told Brooke then that it would be the last time we most likely would speak.
Even though he found me a few months ago, we hadn't really spoken till today. It all started because I noticed he had updated (changed) his website and now it didn't show the dates and places he had gigs. I emailed him to inquire and he emailed me back right away. We wrote back and forth a few times and then shared phone numbers because he wanted to "catch up". A short while later the phone rings.
It started off on a general fill in of the last 12 years. Turns out he tried to look me up about 5 years ago while he was in Houston. I was in Germany at the time and my sister didn't mention he had called.
~~(sigh) .... It is funny I guess. The whole time I am on the phone, my voice seems shaky, my heart beat is faster, I can't breath right and I feel jittery. It is weird how after so much time, old feelings can come out of no where and for no apparent reason.
I am so happy in my life with Marlin. He is truly wonderful and beyond a shadow of a doubt the one for me. With out question, I love him! but so weird how Randy can stir up so much with just entering into my life again (even for a moment)....(sigh)....!!
So looks like Randy may be moving back to the area. It will be nice to have good ol' friends around; Brooke, Trisha, Randy...
..............(sigh)..............Yup. Good to have ol' friends around.
[break into song and rides off into the sunset]
"Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to Thee! How great Thou art! How Great Thou Art!"....
Take for example, Trisha. I thought I would never find that girl and low and behold, she found me on MySpace!
Or how about Shane, another friend from high school I had lost touch with, but found me on MySpace too. (That darn MySpace - hahaha)
And why not give MySpace another plug! Randy had found me there too. (Now there is a good story).
Randy was my best friend in high school. Now many of you may be saying, "Wait a dog gone minute, I thought Brooke was?!"
Brooke was my best (girl) friend. But if ever there was a person who knew me better, almost as well as God Himself, it was Randy. He and I were cut from the same fabric it would seem.
Though through the trials of life, our paths seemed to split after high school. I recall the day we last spoke. We were in a crowded bar and he was telling our old class mates his plan for becoming a musician. I cried. I knew at that moment our friendship was over. Our bond was broken. I told Brooke then that it would be the last time we most likely would speak.
Even though he found me a few months ago, we hadn't really spoken till today. It all started because I noticed he had updated (changed) his website and now it didn't show the dates and places he had gigs. I emailed him to inquire and he emailed me back right away. We wrote back and forth a few times and then shared phone numbers because he wanted to "catch up". A short while later the phone rings.
It started off on a general fill in of the last 12 years. Turns out he tried to look me up about 5 years ago while he was in Houston. I was in Germany at the time and my sister didn't mention he had called.
~~(sigh) .... It is funny I guess. The whole time I am on the phone, my voice seems shaky, my heart beat is faster, I can't breath right and I feel jittery. It is weird how after so much time, old feelings can come out of no where and for no apparent reason.
I am so happy in my life with Marlin. He is truly wonderful and beyond a shadow of a doubt the one for me. With out question, I love him! but so weird how Randy can stir up so much with just entering into my life again (even for a moment)....(sigh)....!!
So looks like Randy may be moving back to the area. It will be nice to have good ol' friends around; Brooke, Trisha, Randy...
..............(sigh)..............Yup. Good to have ol' friends around.
[break into song and rides off into the sunset]
"Then sings my soul, my Saviour God to Thee! How great Thou art! How Great Thou Art!"....
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Saturday Morning
It's Saturday morning.
Last night Jon (Marlin's bestest bud) came over and we played Wii and ordered pizza. It was a good night for all of us. It had been a while since we have seen Jon, so it was nice to spend time with ol' friends.
This morning we got up early, made pancakes and sausage, had coffee and watched Transformers. It is a good morning.
Thank you Father for giving me so much. I am thankful for all the blessings you give me. I am so grateful to you, Father!
Last night Jon (Marlin's bestest bud) came over and we played Wii and ordered pizza. It was a good night for all of us. It had been a while since we have seen Jon, so it was nice to spend time with ol' friends.
This morning we got up early, made pancakes and sausage, had coffee and watched Transformers. It is a good morning.
Thank you Father for giving me so much. I am thankful for all the blessings you give me. I am so grateful to you, Father!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Pick up the Phone!
I have been terrible about keeping in touch with many of my friends (Sorry!).
So I try to call a few folks on my way home tonight to catch up....
I call Angi ... No answer
I call Gill's cell ... voicemail
I call Dawn ... Voicemail
I call Donna's cell ... voicemail
I called Emirza, Garcia, Fran, etc..... VOICEMAIL!!!
...Have you ever had one of those days where no one is home. ...Where you are thinking "will some one just pick up the phone"
Well, sorry I missed you guys. All is well. I Love you all!
God Bless.
So I try to call a few folks on my way home tonight to catch up....
I call Angi ... No answer
I call Gill's cell ... voicemail
I call Dawn ... Voicemail
I call Donna's cell ... voicemail
I called Emirza, Garcia, Fran, etc..... VOICEMAIL!!!
...Have you ever had one of those days where no one is home. ...Where you are thinking "will some one just pick up the phone"
Well, sorry I missed you guys. All is well. I Love you all!
God Bless.
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